From the monthly archives:

January 2008

Suburban Banality

January 31, 2008

Long stretches of domestic tranquility, broken by periods of discontent; this is the pattern.
Warm and cozy mornings mixed with querulous afternoons, marked by burnt cookies and temper tantrums. The dirty toilets and sweatpants mingle to create the lingering, pungent aroma of a post-Betty Friedan search for creative and personal fulfillment.
The minivan in the garage carries [...]

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You Won’t Find Any Of That Here

January 30, 2008

To the person or persons who arrived at this blog via the all-caps Google search for:
STORIES ABOUT DOING THINGS RIGHT
You’re in the wrong place, dude. Move along.

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If She Ever Goes To Ascot, I Know What She’ll Wear

January 30, 2008

See more Wordless Wednesday shots here.

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Playing Hooky

January 29, 2008

The Poo wound up in my bed again last night, and we slept the night through wrapped around one another. I finally rolled over this morning and groggily opened my eyes, taking in dark sky and gloom of the bedroom.
Looking at the clock, I expected to see a number like six or seven.
Instead, I jerked [...]

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WE INTERRUPT THIS BLOG FOR IMPORTANT BREAKING NEWS

January 25, 2008

Turns out all you need to force a small girl to pee and poop on the potty is this:

The Poo was farting up a storm so I asked her if she wanted to sit on the potty. Of course she said no, until I told her this:
IF YOU POOP AND PEE ON THE POTTY YOU [...]

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These Are Days

January 25, 2008

It is cold here on the tundra, er, I mean, the prairie.
Schools here were closed yesterday due to the “mass of arctic air” hanging over this part of the Midwest, and when the local schools close, so does The Poo’s preschool.
When her teacher called the night before (and got a befuddled Mr. C on the [...]

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Overheard At 8:50 p.m.

January 24, 2008

The Poo (in her crib): Mommy, is there a baby in your belly?
Mommy (in the rocking chair): Mmm-hmm. Shh. Go to sleep now.
The Poo: Is it a girl baby or a boy baby?
Mommy: I don’t know, Poo. Time to close your eyes. No more talking now.
The Poo: If it’s a girl baby, we should name [...]

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I Want To Remember This Forever

January 23, 2008

Even when my belly was still flat, when The Poo was just a jellybean in my womb, we would lay on our bed at night and Mr. C would put his ear up to my navel.
“Hi, Baby!” he’d say. “What are you doing in there?”
Then we would sing. At first I refused to join in. [...]

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Tomorrow Has Arrived

January 22, 2008

It seems like we’re always waiting for something.
For graduation, for marriage, for nine months for a child. For the dawn, for the dusk, for the next day when we can get up, face the sun and try again.
Whymommy has been waiting for this day for so many months. She endured so many hurtful chemicals, she [...]

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My Watergate (Cake)

January 21, 2008

I was in journalism school the first time I watched “All The President’s Men.” Already enamored with the idea of writing for a living, the sight of a gloriously golden Robert Redford and a very intense Dustin Hoffman working to bring down a government using only the power of the press was enough to seal [...]

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