The next three months are going to be crazy.
I keep thinking that I have until the middle or end of August to get ready for Shaggy’s arrival, but the fact of the matter is that he will be forcibly removed from my womb by the butcher my OB sometime the first week of August.
Today marks a little more than the midpoint of May. Thursday we leave for Cleveland for five days (don’t ask) and then two days after we get home my mom arrives.
On June 4 I’ll depart for the East Coast, and I won’t be back until at least Father’s Day. Mr. Chicken has his qualifying exams on July 7, which means I won’t see him until July 8. Then he leaves July 18 for Italy.
Three weeks after that, I’ll be a mother of two.
To say I’m starting to panic is putting it mildly. We haven’t done a single thing to get ready for our son’s arrival. No bedding, no furniture, no paint in the nursery, no Dreft in the laundry room. And cash is tight this summer, especially considering that the trip to Italy won’t be reimbursed until nearly fall.
In my panic, I decided to press Mr. C on getting the crap out of our basement and up into the garage so I can have a yard sale. You saw the pile of clothing that came up, so you can imagine what else was down there. I expect to make enough to hire someone to paint the nursery and buy a dresser/changing table for the kid.
We couldn’t have accomplished anything yesterday if my mother-in-law hadn’t been here.
Not only did she and her husband take The Poo all day long, they helped Mr. C ferry all the crap up from the basement and into the garage so I can price it all and get it ready for display.
I’ve had my share of conflicts with my MIL. There were bumpy spots in the road along the way, and sometimes she drives me batshit crazy - especially at Christmas, or when she gets on a kick about her ex-husband, who happens to be my husband’s father and The Poo’s only living genetic grandfather.
But as far as the MIL sweepstakes goes, I’m a winner. She helps us financially. She helps us with her time. She loves The Poo beyond all reason, and she is anticipating the arrival of her second grandchild with glee.
My husband is an only child, and I am the bearer and minder of her only genetic heirs. I have achieved a status I never thought I would - Golden Goose.
I know she loves me for me, as well. She supports my writing. She takes my side in conflicts with my husband. She drove 750 miles just to come and wash my kitchen floor this week so I don’t have to.
It is easy for me to look at the dark side. I’m programmed to look at the underbelly, designed to see my glass half-empty.
But yesterday as I emerged from our now half-empty, clean and organized basement to see The Poo in her cherry bathing suit potting fresh herbs with her paternal grandmother, I was struck by just how lucky I am.
May 18th, 2008 at 11:14 am
What a great feeling! And thanks to your cleaning out of that basement I have found a new generous friend… thank you! If I could come help you with that nursery, I would!
Steph
May 18th, 2008 at 11:28 am
that is so beautiful. what a gift she is and what a lovely way to honor her.
May 18th, 2008 at 11:39 am
How lovely. I am sure she knows how you feel, having driven all that way.
May 18th, 2008 at 12:05 pm
the golden goose!! haha that made me giggle!!
soo happy to hear about the clean floors and the organized basement. not to mention the wonderful mil moment!
lucky indeed!
May 18th, 2008 at 1:12 pm
You are lucky… my MIL is just … well… words can’t quite describe..
She looks lovely x
May 18th, 2008 at 5:16 pm
I have Golden Goose status too. My brother-in-law got divorced so now I’m the only daughter-in-law…
May 18th, 2008 at 7:07 pm
I, too, am married to an only child and SHOULD have Golden Goose status. Alas, my MIL and FIL are not fans of mine or of my kids. Count your blessings- you are one lucky duck! (:
May 18th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
OK, so why the butcher?..and Italy three weeks before the baby?
I was freaking out when John went to cleveland four weeks before the baby.
The floor scrubbing, however, is priceless.
May 19th, 2008 at 12:26 am
Oh, I love this photo and your acceptance of her love and pitching in to help.
Not knowing too much about your situation, I don’t want to assume too much here.
However, my own mother has been actively and passive-aggressively withdrawing from us for many years (especially since E was born).
Meanwhile, my MIL often steps in without question. She also can be judgemental and narrow-focused, but she loves and helps without question.
Anyway… sometimes I wish *my* mom could be a little more like my MIL. Meanwhile, I keep trying to encourage and support my MIL, and I’m letting my mom live her own (obviously-chosen, at this point) life more and more.
May 19th, 2008 at 12:30 am
Also, please tell your MIL that I love that she cares about you all enough to do the ugly things (washing the floors) and the pretty things (planting flowers with The Poo). What a kind, thoughtful soul she is. Yay, Grandma Chicken! We all need help sometimes, and how great that she saw what needed to be done and did it while loving The Poo in the special grandma way.
May 19th, 2008 at 4:00 pm
That’s not luck. That’s blessed!
How I wish I had a MIL like that. I really wish it more for my husband than for myself.
May 19th, 2008 at 4:23 pm
She sounds like a gift.
PS If you want to feel better about your lack of preparedness, let me send you a photo of E’s room. She is 27 months old and we still haven’t done a thing with it, save for erecting a wall between her room and ours, which is still raw gypsum with drywall screws.
May 19th, 2008 at 7:30 pm
Very lucky indeed.
I feel similarly about my MIL. She is not perfect, but she was a good mother to my husband, is a fantastic, loving, devoted grandmother, and makes a real effort to be a good friend and helper to me. I hear some in-law stories that curl my hair from my friends, so I know we’re equally lucky/blessed in this area.
May 19th, 2008 at 7:54 pm
Smiling for you!
May 20th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
Can I have your MIL? Mine hates the ground I walk on. OK, can I borrow her and show my MIL how she should be?
June 29th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
[...] I kid, I kid. Seriously, she will help. [...]