I am a total bore.
*holds up hands*
No, really, I am.
I want to write something stirring, or lovely, or melancholy about the upcoming shift in my family, but I just can’t.
I’m all out of words, at least the good ones. I wrote three columns, an essay and two sidebars for publication yesterday and the well is, like, so very, very dry.
Even worse, nothing new happened here today.
It was the same as every damn day, which is, I suppose, for the best. Mr. C went to work. The Poo went to school. I went to the OB.
I did find out that I have to go the the doctor twice a week between now and when I give birth - one visit I will get a limited sonogram, and the other will include being hooked up to the fetal monitor.
Yippee.
I did finally find out why it feels like there is something stuck underneath my ribs on the right side of my body.
And that’s because there is a very large, human FOOT stuck underneath my ribs on my right side.
That’s it. That’s all there is to see here today.
Wendy’s tweet that she feels like some bloggers are getting fewer comments rang true for me, if only because I am SO FUCKING BORING right now. I am even BORING MYSELF.
So do me a wee favor, eh? Leave me a comment? Delurk? Tell me something funny, or tragic or interesting or just plain NOT BORING.
Because people. I am NINE MILLION DAYS PREGNANT. My husband is leaving for ITALY WITHOUT ME in 10 days. My MOTHER-IN-LAW is coming for TEN DAYS. My RIGHT FOOT is SWOLLEN. My mom and sister are at Indian Neck Beach WITHOUT ME.
And I know there are FOUR HUNDRED of you out there. Can we push me over the 100-comment mark?
And I am SO FUCKING BORED.
Entertain me.
Pleaaaassseeeeee?
*whines and eats a WASA cracker*
PS - If I get to 100 comments, I’ll send No. 100 a Starbucks card. SOMEONE should be able to have a FRICKIN’ LATTE. DAMN DIABEETUS.
***EDITED****
Instead of sending a card to No. 100, I’ll choose a winner at random. That seems more fair. XOXOX
July 8th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
I’m sorry you’re nine million days pregnant. The baby WILL come out..eventually.
I have your blog on feed. I never find you boring.. at all.. but I suck at the comment leaving thingie.
Hang in there.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
I feel a similar lul in my blogging power right now, and I don’t even have a pregnancy to blame. Comments have dropped off and I am less motivated if people aren’t going to shower me with praise.
You rock, you are funny and I love your blog. Have a good one, even with a foot sticking in your ribs.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:27 pm
Do you know why 6 is afraid of 7? 789.
That’s all I got in the “funny” department.
Good luck… and soon you will be whining for a host of new reasons
July 8th, 2008 at 1:27 pm
Boring? HArdly. You’re a constant on my daily-roll checking. I luv you!
July 8th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
Well, darnit, I won’t be getting your Number One Hundred latte, but heck, I’ll comment!
I know it sucks, but you’re SO almost done. And you really are not boring - you’re just… you know… gestating? And sick-to-death of it? Totally understandable.
All in good time, dearie - soon you’ll have more blog fodder than you know what to do with (tales of the second section; first days with a new sibling; sleepless nights and baby-puke days)… oh yes, you’ll regale us all with wild and funny and sad and silly things again. Soon.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
Maybe it’s summer and more people are outside instead of blog reading? I only wish I was… without my super cranky teething child.
Hang in there!
July 8th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
Oh no! The Pledge Drive edition of C&C! Ah, well. NPR gets my money, and Mrs. C gets my comment.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
It is 107 degrees in Sacramento CA.
I can’t wear shorts or skirts because my cankles are so swollen from being 21 weeks pregnant in 107 degree heat.
My little Shim (our baby’s in utero nickname) is kicking MY right ribs constantly, I smell like a pregnant woman “down there” and there is nothing I can do about it because it is a hunderd and seven fucking degrees here.
and I’m working 8 hours a day
and my back is killing me from picking up a 30 lb 16 month old, and squeezing her into the back seat of my civic coupe.
Just thought I’d commiserate with you.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
It does seem like comments have dropped since kids got out of school and people started going on summer vacations. Don’t they know that they are supposed to take their laptops on vacation and let the kids discover independent play during the summer?
My summer is far from boring and all the stuff going on is making me slack in the comment department too. My mom’s is staying with us while a leg infection heals. Along with her comes 2 irish setters. That means I have 4 large and crazy dogs in my house. Honey is tired of poop scooping.
Oh, we had to move the guest bed into the living room. I have to help Princess and my mom wash up every morning and night.
And last night I discovered GIMP and started editing my digital photos. There is a definite possibility that I may never get a full night of sleep again this summer.
Can I trade places with you? I’d love to be bored and pregnant.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
You’re not boring. I’m too lazy to comment. But, here’s a comment now! I hope you are staying cool.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:36 pm
I may be delurking, may not…I read you site on a feed reader…
I think the boredom is this day. I am at school (year-round school is the work of the devil) teaching art to juvenile delinquents and I am intensely bored today, as well.
Who knew delinquents could be so boring?
July 8th, 2008 at 1:38 pm
I’m more boring than you are - neener neener!! (I did just post pics of some ROCKIN shoes. That’s all I got.)
July 8th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
Ahh! Summer in Central Illinois! It is wonderful! (Snort) Hang in there!
July 8th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
I’m here! I may read you via RSS, but I’m still here, and even more boring than you. I’m only 21 wks pregnant, and have barely been able to blog more than once any given 2 weeks for months now — I envy your words, even if it’s mostly about feeling their lack! Thanks for sharing all you thoughts with us out here.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
I am not pregnant. And things are far from boring here. But I can’t seem to write. Blog burnout? Knowing I will be at BlogHer and feeling overwhelmed already? Or just simply that it is summer which means no break from children. I hope the next few weeks fly by for you and you get to welcome Shaggy when and how you’d like!
Oh, and I’d love to volunteer to blogsit but I am afraid! (so not worthy of writing here)
July 8th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
I feel for you… I was pregnant during a hot SoCal summer with twins, and made so many trips to the OB/specialist that it seemed like the fetal monitors were permanently connected! I’m also bored at work today.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:45 pm
Oh, Mrs. C. You poor dear. I wish I had something fun to report, but alas, nada. Well, not totally nothing. I darn near came to blows with the car dude at my dealership because he was trying to tell me my warranty expired in June when it really expires November 7. And my repair was MAJOR. Yeah, nothing like a little “I’m going to kick your ass” adrenaline to get the day jump started.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:46 pm
*Comments*
Oh trust me, you’re still not boring. I check CAC about three or four times a day for updates. In the mornings before I go to work, when I come home for lunch, when I come home again after work, and usually before I go to bed. If you were boring, I doubt I’d be doing this. *HUGS*
Hmmm… I should comment more than once today, for simple gratuitous posting… I don’t need the Starbucks voucher (I don’t think we even HAVE Starbucks in South Africa)… but you need to feel the love, chicka!
I never get comments on my livejournal… so I do understand. *HUGS*
July 8th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
*Comments again, just for fun.*
July 8th, 2008 at 1:54 pm
Oh, I’m so sorry. Being Nine Million Days pregnant sucks the big one, especially when you feel like crap and it seems like everybody is out doing fun things without you. Why don’t you book a day for yourself while your hubby is in Italy? Get a babysitter and go shopping, or go to a spa, or go see a chick flick matinee in a nice air conditioned theatre? Might do wonders…
July 8th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
Here I was, thinking I was going to have t o spam you to be number 100. But then, there’s no Starbucks out here, so it would be kind of a mute point.
Hang in there!
I’m pretty boring myself lately.
July 8th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
Delurking to comment away!
At least I get to visit on the company’s dime 
Thinking good thoughts for you this next few weeks - nice, cool thoughts 
My husband is going to Italy without me too - but for about 9 months
July 8th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
I think I have commented before…but it has been a while. My boring/sad comment is that my husband and I are thinking about getting a divorce. And we are only 26. Fun.
Too bad you couldn’t keep the 8.8.08 birthday for Shaggy, I thought that was really cool.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
Every time you write diabeetus it make me immediately think of Wilford Brimley riding on a horse, and that makes me laugh.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
Ok, Ok, I got one! The only joke that I know happens to be appropriate here today:
What do you call a cow that has just given birth?
De-calf-inated!
See! A caffiene joke, and a pregant joke… not that we’re cows… but you know…
Can I be comment number 24 and comment number 100?
July 8th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
FFN: I feel you.
C&C: I’ll send you some excitement. Or maybe some kind of Cape-ish care package?
The iced teas at Starbucks are good unsweetened. I like the passion and the green.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
dude. i’m so feeling you. in fact i was thinking of you today and smiling.
i want you to come guest post at my place. don’t think, just say yes. the topic is yours.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:19 pm
You are NOT boring. I think it’s just the summertime blues. Everyone’s got them. I know my comments and hits are down, but I can attribute that partly to changing my url. (self hosted, woohoo!)
It’s kinda sad how much I live for comments though. I wish I’d thought of a comment contest!
I live for Starbucks too
July 8th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
Here is a story for you. When I was pregnant the first time I got PUPPS. Heard of it? Hideous, humongous, hellishly itchy hives all over your torso (the part that is already all disgustingly swollen anyway), then arms and legs. Picture me in the bathroom after Easter Sunday Mass, removing the only gigantic maternity dress I could fit into (did I mention I had a 9.5 pounder?) so I could slather myself with another whole tube of extra strength hydrocortisone.
The good news: You only get it with pregnancy #1. So that is a fate you are spared.
Small favors, Mrs. C — small favors.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Nine million days? Wow, I think you might be a tad overdue.
How many people are sitting on their hands not commenting because they want to wait and be #100? I don’t drink coffee myself so doesn’t matter to me.
I’d like to have 20 plus comments on a regular basis and be able to complain that my comments are down. That would be cool.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Ah, I found you through Growing Curious and I’ve really been enjoying your posts. I’ll delurk and bump up your comment count!
Lisa
July 8th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
I don’t think I’ve commented before, so here I am delurking. Hi! Here’s something interesting to think about - my brother is married to my husband’s sister, so my brother is also my brother-in-law.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:26 pm
My alter ego sends her comment love too!
July 8th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
You are NOT boring. I read every day because I know you’ll provide some entertainment or life insight.
I am newly single so maybe you work on drumming up some nice single men to pass along my way. Hee. I hope some day I get to mother two beautiful children!
July 8th, 2008 at 2:30 pm
Forgot to say that all three of my kids did the foot-in-the-ribs thing. Makes them have very strong legs. D was already “standing” at 2 weeks.
I’m not sure if this is good or bad, but I thought I’d add it since you’re wanting extra comment love…
July 8th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
ALways happy to do my part.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
Oh poor baby. There, there, there. Do you feel better now?
July 8th, 2008 at 2:36 pm
I’m not pregnant, so I can’t say I know what you are going through. However, it sounds pretty bad and contributes to my fear of what it will take for my husband and me to procreate. I’m delurking today and leaving a comment because you begged me to and because you are kind enough to entertain me every day in this godforsaken cubicle, so it’s only polite to return the favor.
Here’s a question for you. Do you put your bra on face-first (so to speak) and then reach around back to hook it or do you hook it in the front first and then spin the whole thing around and put your arms through the straps? My friends and I had this discussion once and it still fascinates me that there is more than one way to get dressed in the morning.
July 8th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
If I had a magic Star-Trek style transporter (only then it wouldn’t be magic.. it’d be, like, “sciencifical”) I would whisk you and the Poo instantly to the Cape every morning and return you in time for your Dr appt’s.
July 8th, 2008 at 3:04 pm
I never made it to a million days pregnant, and sometimes I am secretly happy about that. I didn’t have to endure a foot in the ribs, but her head was literally stuck in my pelvis, which meant I had to pee every 20 minutes. And I feel ya with The Diabeetus - I had it myself! Are you allowed graham crackers? That’s what they gave me when I was in the hospital, so I figure they have to be ok. Right?
July 8th, 2008 at 3:12 pm
YOu will get more sympathy if you don’t brag about your 400 readers and 100 comments. Bitch.
I am here. Technically in Florida. My grandma got drunk and dipped her hand in her wine and shoved it in my baby’s mouth last night. So things aren’t boring here, just maddening.
July 8th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
I had a foot under my rib cage for months. Good news is that when the baby comes out, so does the foot.
July 8th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
you are far. far. far. from boring friend.
wish i had something to make you giggle. or smile.
but its raining here? do you like rain? i can send you some? you could drink that right?
July 8th, 2008 at 3:24 pm
Greetings! Delurking here too. I enjoy your site. I was pregnant during this time of year many moons ago. I can remember just sitting in the tub to keep cool (pre air condition in military housing) NOW THAT WAS BORING. Keep your pregnant, boring chin up…soon you will have mush for brains from an infant fatigue…..and that is another whole writing block!
July 8th, 2008 at 3:27 pm
i think you’re funny. even if you are a miserable 9 million days pregnant, i think you’re funny. not funny that you feel terrible, but your rants are funny.
i think i feel like an asshole now. i’m pretty sure i’ve delurked before.
hey, here’s a question for you to ponder… how do awards get started? does one blogger just make one up and pass it around? and then it gets popular? you should start an award thing in your boredom.
July 8th, 2008 at 3:31 pm
oh yeah, and about the comments thing… i think because it was such a harsh winter, everyone’s outside. i noticed a decline in clickership and comments and postings once spring hit. then it got HOT, and people stayed inside with their air conditioning and posted.
can i win something for being the one who posts the most comments on this post?
July 8th, 2008 at 3:32 pm
You know I’m always here. I think summer is just quieter, everyone’s on vacation or something.
You’ll have that baby soon, I swear. I wish your summer was flying as fast as mine!
Now go tell Lori at Spinning Yellow that she’s worthy of writing here! That’s ridiculous!
Hang in there. xoxo
July 8th, 2008 at 3:42 pm
De-lurking to share this vignette:
Sabrina opens the dvd player and inserts a dvd.
Mommy: Sabrina, what movie are you putting on?
Sabrina: Ummmm…the one with the hottie?
Mommy wrinkles her forehead and looks at Daddy.
Daddy: Aeon Flux. And she’s right, Charlize Theron is a hottie…
July 8th, 2008 at 4:02 pm
I can remember being pregnant with my third - my daughter - who basically had her toes wrapped around the bottom of my ribcage - and would stretched to her full length at least 5 times daily. I never knew if she would break my ribs or pop out the bottom. Oh, and for the record - I’m a bored blogger as well - nothing of interest to write about whatsoever….
July 8th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Ugh, I’m sorry. Big hugs to you. You will not be pregnant some day very soon, I promise!
GD sucks. I had it both times. Bad mommy confession - I was bad and cheated sometimes. How can one live without chocolate??? It’s just WRONG!
July 8th, 2008 at 4:15 pm
Delurking, with a funny story for you… one which has become an urban legend in just a few short years, but which, at it’s heart, actually is true:
A mom and her son went to the St Louis Zoo to see the new, amazing Penguin house, back when it was new (it’s still amazing!). The son had had some health issues with his lungs, and he got tired easily, but they had learned to deal with it. He also had an obsession with his backpack, and he wore it EVERYWHERE. The penguin house was as amazing as they had been told- the penguins were right there, so close and loud and cool! And the puffins, in the next room, were so adorable and friendly and right there! When they got outside, the son said that he was tired and wanted to go home. The mom, of course, didn’t argue, and into the car they went. When they got home, the son ran right on upstairs and started to run himself a bath. Now, kiddo had never taken a bath voluntarily in his life, so the mom knew something was up. She went up to check it out, and there in her bathtub… was a puffin! I guess that backpack came in handy.
In other words, I guess, enjoy “boring” while you have it!
July 8th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
Sending you lots of beachy love from the shores of Honolulu. For real.
The ninth month of pregnancy should be illegal. Amen.
July 8th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
Okay, something not boring…
Saturday we were at a cookout and when the menfolk couldn’t get the fire lit my husband offered us up to go fetch supplies. We left my daughter (17 months old with friends the first time leaving her with a non-family member).
We got back ten minutes later to find that she wasn’t there. They let some friends of THEIRS take her. The woman said “I offered to go with but they said they didn’t want me to. They’d rather take her by themselves.”
And then things got so much worse.
She’s okay. We’re okay. No one was killed. I still think I might punch someone in the face though.
July 8th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
Not too much going on anywhere I don’t think…we’re smack in the middle of the lazy days of summer. However, could someone tell me how my son’s bday party that was going to be “small and quaint” has suddenly turned into the darn circus??
July 8th, 2008 at 4:28 pm
Girl, you crack me up!
Your life is anything but boring. You do whine a bit but I always enjoy reading your posts.
Hmm, maybe that means my life is boring!
Kathy from Washington State
July 8th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
You’re not boring. I don’t check boring people’s websites mulitple times a day
Hope that the rest of the pregnancy goes super fast!
July 8th, 2008 at 4:33 pm
(delurking)
I feel your pain. In January I too was 9 million days pregnant with gestational diabetes. I *begged* my OB to do my cesarian (baby was breech and folded up like a taco) in January. I had to wait until 2/7 and I almost had to wait until 2/12 because the specialist’s nurse and my OB had a “miscommunication”.
Hang in there!!!
July 8th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
(delurking here too)
Just wanted to let you know I love your blog. Hoping you are feeling better. Whine all you want you have every reason to be cranky !!
July 8th, 2008 at 4:52 pm
Delurking…
I love your blog, woman. And as for your recent boredome/suckage…my Dad recently offered this to me upon hearing my whining about work woes lately: In life, sometimes you are the windshield and sometimes you are the bug.
Now ain’t that the truth. You’re the bug now, but when Shaggy comes you’ll totally be the windshield…takin’ names and lovin’ life!
July 8th, 2008 at 4:55 pm
“Knock, knock…”
I’ve got nothing. Hope your day is more exciting, expecially since you’re approaching 100 comments!
July 8th, 2008 at 4:59 pm
Listen here, Little Missy. We don’t get what we just just because we whine about it.
You get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit.
Anymore whining and Momma will turn this car around. Right. Now.
Don’t make me come up there.
No more whining, and I mean it! (anybody want a peanut?) Sorry…I always tend to revert to misquoting The Princess Bride when I’m frustrated.
Ooops. I guess none of these apply here, and since you got a comment out of me, you didn’t learn anything about not whining.
Hang in there!!
July 8th, 2008 at 5:00 pm
DiaBEEtus…hee hee. I thought I was the only one who noticed that type of stuff.
It will end. Promise. Keep your chin and your boobs up, you’ll be fine
July 8th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
Delurking here for the possibility of free caffeine.
I am being held hostage by 3 children who have started figuring out that they can work together and execute a plan of attack.
Please help me!
July 8th, 2008 at 5:11 pm
I’ve got nothing witty or funny- I’m teaching a class that borders on mind-numbing, and the numbers are dropping fast. Only 9 students left. Think I can scare off the others before the end of the summer
July 8th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
It’s too bad you can’t pop him out earlier. I consider my wife lucky (talented or amazing maybe?) for popping out ours 7 days earlier than expected.
Anyway… every time you talk about the diabeetus, it makes me think of the Wilford Brimley remix videos on YouTube, like this one:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=2hNu1I9r_1A
July 8th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
Sorry sister…I got nothin’. My life is boring right now too.
My cat did throw up in my tart burner last night though. Thank god I noticed before I turned it on! I can’t imagine what it would have smelled like.
July 8th, 2008 at 5:34 pm
YOU are entertaining.
July 8th, 2008 at 5:35 pm
So, how about I love your blog? It all started way back this winter when I realized I was pregnant, and was doing some googling for women dishing out advice on how to make it through this thing called pregnancy, just after I had realized I wasn’t going to be a very nice pregnant woman. I’m due on the 31st of this month, with what they say will be a sweet fuzzy headed little girl. I don’t believe them, because it REALLY feels like a boy, and it also really feels like it might be part demon, or monster, or something very very very strange and certainly not sweet or precious. It has been both the most wonderful (that’s bull$#!*) experience and the most draining; READ: it’s Terrifying!!!
And afterwards go to Barnes and Noble (if you have one?) and sit and read magazines for an hour while your little bit looks at story books. Better yet, go to one that has a story hour…and let her be a little bit unruly if you must. But she won’t, ’cause the pool will wear her out…
I’m still a student,undergrad, and although I go to a VERY good school, I have felt so very out of place during my pregnancy, which is worsened by the fact that my mother is 7.5 hours away, and I miss her like, well. Your blog has really helped me find little things to giggle at and enjoy about every single crazy day.
Your first post I read was “Nothing says I love you like Charleston Chews,” and even though I had never ever even tried Charleston Chews (I suspect I may be a teensy bit younger than you…- I’m 22…) I definitely thought I was going to die if I didn’t get my hands on some. So I ventured out for my first pregnant solo shopping experience, and scoured the earth for Charleston Chews. They ARE good, don’t get me wrong, but they didn’t stick like all the other pregnancy tastes I acquired on that day wandering around in the grocery store (like Cap’n Crunch with olives…yum!). Anyway,I have bookmarked at that specific entry into your blog though, just because I loved it so much, and I always see it before I navigate to your most recent writings, which have been something definite for me to look forward to. It gives me an interesting starting point for which to look at your entries though, and it seems like you’ve navigated away from one misery to another, and I’m sure now you are hating me for bringing up the Charleston Chews, with the “Diabeetus” as you say.
I think, that since your days are stinking so incredibly much, you should take my recipe for a nice afternoon and give it a try:
you should hop off to the pool for *a while* and really relax. That doesn’t mean playing mommy tugboat, or ‘catch me when I jump in’ or ‘DID you see me splash????’, but really really relaxing with some floaties(noodles I think they’re called?) under each arm and sunblock on the noses, and anywhere else you can reach
I chose B&N for relaxing for several reasons- they always ALWAYS keep their bathroom clean, they have a cafe with comfy seats, it’s air conditioned, and they have reading selections (as nice as any library around where I am, at least).
And hey, if you think I’m crazy, and it sounds boring and I sound stupid and young, just take some Tylenol and channel all of your discomfort my way: I will take it to the pool myself.
July 8th, 2008 at 5:42 pm
Let’s see - the storm the night ater you were here knocked our power out or 4 hours causing the sump pump to quit and the back up didn’t last 4 hours. The basement flooded and the clean up crew revealed hidden extensive mold from the time three years ago that the basement flooded and the clean up crew didn’t do what they were supposed to. Plus the urnace is emitting a constant medium loud squeal, the fridge got struck by lightening and isn’t working, and I’m going without a paycheck for 25 days EVEN though I ended my last job on Friday and started the new job on Monday.
July 8th, 2008 at 6:12 pm
Wow. Who knew all it took was a little pick-me-up from Starbucks to bring everybody together?
Coffee or no, I still think you’re exciting.
July 8th, 2008 at 6:12 pm
I was coming here to post before I finished reading and saw you are giving away Starbucks to some lucky commenter.
I read you daily, don’t comment lots (or maybe I do) as I don’t want to seem like a stalker….or at least that is what I feel like at times.
Hmmm, something tragic or funny…..Giggles, my 13.5 yo daughter, has been feeling pretty low and unappreciated this summer by her friends. We had this long talk about if you call your friends you won’t be seem needy and desparate, they are probably feeling the same way you are. We chat about how all teenage girls (okay maybe just me) feel that way in the summer. Plus its hot and you have all these other issues and summer sometimes isn’t as fun as it is to your younger sister. Finally when we finish talking I asked her if she had any questions.
“Just one Mom” she says “Do I really have to call my friends….can’t I just text them”
Grrrr! I think texting teenagers are tragic. But thankfully she did text her friends and got to hang out for bit and felt much better. (altho today she never changed out of her pj’s. She said it was too hot. UGH!)
July 8th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
Nice try, but you couldn’t possibly be boring. Since when is a human foot lodged in a ribcage boring? Honestly.
I’m in California and it’s over a hundred degrees and the whole state seems to be on fire. And it’s… muggy. I’m not sure what to make of that. It’s a new sensation for us Californians, and I have to say I’m not too keen on it so far. How on earth does one get anything done when the air is squishing your brain?
Anyway, good luck with the next few weeks. Here’s something silly, if you haven’t seen it before:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=wSqFqhUzutg
July 8th, 2008 at 6:15 pm
Dude. I just googled the word orgasming to see if I spelled it right in a tweet (I did.) Anyway, in the search I found this (non-porno) advice site in which a woman was asking for advice about why she orgasms every time she uses her fucking AB ROLLER.
HA!
Talk about motivation to work out.
If I win for a comment about exercise orgasms, I’m DEFINITELY getting a super-sugary iced latte.
xo
July 8th, 2008 at 6:31 pm
You aren’t boring! growing a baby takes a lot out of you. Cut yourself some slack and try and rest up, especially when the MIL gets there. Lie on the bed watching daytime soaps and eating chocolate. God, I want to do that right now and I’m not even pregnant!
July 8th, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Oh man! I feel your pain! My son was an August baby and nothing sucks more than being fat and boring inthe sweltering summer heat!
July 8th, 2008 at 6:40 pm
uck, I was that pregnant in winter, I have no clue how you are doing it!
I will give you one of my favorite summer camp ditties. The Poo may like it.
Said…really really fast.
“Did you ever kiss your hunny when your nose was kinda runny well if you think it’s kinda funny its’not.”
July 8th, 2008 at 6:50 pm
You seem pretty interesting to me!
I’ll do just about anything for Starbucks!
Seriously, hang in there…those late days of pregnancy are tough. ((hugs)))
July 8th, 2008 at 6:52 pm
Hmm… I don’t think I have anything tragic or funny to tell you. But I can completely understand being Nine Million Days pregnant with #2 who has his foot stuck into your rib cage! That was me only 7 weeks ago. Fun times, eh?
BUT I do love your blog and read daily! Like you, my DH (finally) got his PhD in a town FAR FAR from our families a few years ago, so I feel you.
Hang in there! Soon there won’t be a foot kicking you from inside and hopefully, you’ll feel all the better for it!
July 8th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
I don’t comment for just anyone, but since you asked…the most interesting thing that happened to me today is that the baby took a 3 hour nap. IT’S A NEW MOTHER’S MIRACLE.
July 8th, 2008 at 7:10 pm
Boring? Not you!
Now, me? That’s boring! The day I got 9 comments I about peed my pants!!
July 8th, 2008 at 7:27 pm
Mrs. Chicken, you should be commended for getting a crapload of writing/columns out of the way. And if you’re interested, post birth, I’ll carry in the dessert of your choice (just tell me what you want).
My big even today was trying to find a flipping store in C-U that sells big girl bras that don’t fall apart in three days. We furrowed our brows at the mall since the speciality undergarment stores and department stores have limited qualities (apparently they assume if you’re a 38 DD you’re a grandma) and ended up at Confidentially Yours, where we got names I haven’t seen since I could shop at Nordstrom’s.
So my friend and I were chatting about how we’ll drop loads of cash on the kids without a thought but paying $40 for a bra seemed insane… she bought one, I just got sized. Turns out that unlike Oprah, I was at least able to figure that life mystery out on my own, which is a shock since I can’t open a box of triscuits without using scissors. I keep thinking that someone’s going to find out about that and take away my graduate degree.
“You can’t have this because you can’t open that box of triscuits with your opposable thumbs, dumbass!”
Can I ask how Mr. Chicken feels about going to Italy? Is he terrified you’ll go into labor? Is he happy to get away? Is it work so he’s — meh about it?
July 8th, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Let’s see…something entertaining…yeah, unfortunatly we don’t do that kind of thing here. Every day is painfully the same.
However, today I was trying to teach my daughter to say “peaches” while reading her a book o’ fruit. She’s not quite two, and kept screaming “BITCHES! BITCHES!” with sheer glee. That was kinda funny. But that’s all I got.
Sending you hugs!
July 8th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
Because I love you…
I’ve got a bankish type joke for you, with love from one of my customers:
A bank robber walks into a bank with a ski mask on. As he makes his way to the first teller, he slip and falls on the tile floor. He hits his head and his ski mask flies off. After picking himself up off the floor and replacing his mask, he turns to the first man in line and asks him if he saw his face. The man answers yes. The robber shoots him. He turns to the next person in line: a woman. When the robber asks if she saw his face, she replys, “No but my Husband did.”
You’re welcome.
July 8th, 2008 at 8:44 pm
You are not boring. And besides, someday when the child currently kicking your ribs is thirteen, you can use all of this for inducing guilt. Instead of saying you were in labor for 46 hours, you can mention the loooong months you went without sugar and Starbucks, and suffered quietly, all for this future teenagers health, and now said teenager will not even clean her room after all the suffering you experienced…
July 8th, 2008 at 8:57 pm
boring … no way i love your blog! you want boring come visit mine… all i have to talk about is the upcoming and tv…
i am pregnant and it’s summer… i am out of excuses!!
July 8th, 2008 at 9:08 pm
i so heart you.
definitely. not. boring.
July 8th, 2008 at 9:12 pm
Okay, Mrs Whiney Bored Cracker Eater you officially sound like my four year old. You two should totally hang out.
Sorry about the foot in your lung though. That sounds sucky.
Regarding comment numbers, have been commenting less, even on blogs I read every day (like yours), because I feel like I am just adding to the guilt/obligation some feel about managing comments. I try to only comment if I feel like I have something interesting to add or find something really touching. Or if someone asks for comments and offers a starbucks gift card
July 8th, 2008 at 9:15 pm
I never comment, but read often and not bored at all. I just had my second baby a little over a week ago. No interesting stories, but I was quite excited to discover the gestational diabetes I was diagnosed with at 6 weeks pregnant, went away immediately!! I checked my blood sugar an hour after eating WAY TOO MANY OREO’S and it was only 119!! That’s something to look forward to- I’m assuming you have GD, but haven’t been reading that long so am not sure?
July 8th, 2008 at 9:16 pm
I am sitting here pumping for the 6th time today (3 month old exclusively breastmilk fed baby that won’t latch is sitting in the swing). I totally inderstand how long those last days of pregnancy are. I was also pg during the summer almost 4 years ago (Aug.’04 Kiddo) so I understand the discomfort with that too.
Hang in there Hon. You are far from boring. I wouldn’t check in every day if you were.
Soon enough all this will be behind you and you’ll be holding that sweet baby in your arms. And no matter how well or how poorly breastfeeding goes, you will still have the joy of two beautiful children and you will do the best you can. And that is more than enough.
(((big hugs)))
July 8th, 2008 at 9:40 pm
sweet fancy moses look at all of these comments!
Oh, and btw? skinny sugar free lattes….just saying…
July 8th, 2008 at 9:46 pm
Delurking to say, hang in in there. Spending the summer pregnant isn’t fun. I remember with #4 wanting this whole game to over way sooner than it actually was. Sending cyber hugs your way.
July 8th, 2008 at 9:57 pm
Ask and you received. I have nothing entertaining to say post staging exhaustion…wish I did.
Hang in there…
July 8th, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Hey! 93, here!!
You suck? Nuh uh… I haven’t posted in a month!! I SUCK!!
You rock, even when you’re whining.
*smooch*
July 8th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Bored? I wish I was. There’s been entirely too much excitement around my way lately. Take comfort in the fact that I, for one, am extremely jealous of your lack of drama.
July 8th, 2008 at 10:24 pm
I’m way more boing than you. Our life is basically: breakfast, park, lunch, “rest time” (since she doesn’t fight that like she does nap, even though she still naps everyday), pool, dinner, TV time, and bed. Occasionally, I get wild and through in a playgroup.
And I have no excuse for being boring, I’m not even pregnant. I am just boring
July 8th, 2008 at 10:31 pm
Life here is not boring, but there’s more irony than I like in life though. Fertility treatments suck. Everyone is pregnant around here and I just keeping hoping my ovaries don’t explode. Work is the farthest thing from my mind but my annual review is next week. It’s getting hot. And you should listen to my hubby try to teach our 2 year old relaxation techniques. hahahaha
I do feel bad for you that only one foot is swollen…I hate asymetry. Hang in there for all of us!
July 8th, 2008 at 10:40 pm
96 comments!? This makes 97…you’re so close!!
July 8th, 2008 at 11:17 pm
I am laughing my head off right now! You are so far from boring, even with this post!
While I am not pregnant (at least I don’t think so you could cross your fingers for me though) I sympathize. I sympathize even more that your Hubby is leaving (mine just got back from a very long time away), and even more that your MIL is coming to stay…that I could never, ever handle!
July 8th, 2008 at 11:34 pm
Number 99 unless someone pushes submit before I do. I can not think of anything that isn’t boring…..good luck.
July 8th, 2008 at 11:54 pm
Awwww, cause I’m 100!
July 9th, 2008 at 12:06 am
Hey, you hit a hundred before I got here - congrats!
I have nothing amusing to say because I’m still too sleep deprived. Soon, I hope.
July 9th, 2008 at 12:10 am
Something interesting:
Last weekend my mom got part of a chicken taquito stuck in her esophagus for 7 hours, requiring a trip to the ER (for which I was there the entire time), anesthesia and surgery. Good times.
July 9th, 2008 at 5:44 am
Well I’m boring to. Except I’ve separated from my husband (which is good), bought my own house, and went back to work full time with two children under the age of 4 all in the matter of three weeks….boring - I’ll take it any day of the week.
July 9th, 2008 at 6:20 am
I never find you boring. I, on the other hand, am dreadfully boring. So. I guess that’s it.
July 9th, 2008 at 6:46 am
I’ve been riding on the coattails of guest bloggers for a week while on vacation–they were so awesome I may have to take the summer off! And be boring!
Loving the latte promise…
July 9th, 2008 at 7:45 am
I am the ultimate in blog boring I have figured out. I get less then 20 comments on any given post and you get over 100 I am SOOO boring
July 9th, 2008 at 7:55 am
Delurking to say if you’re boring after knocking out all those assignments in one day, I don’t know what that makes me when all I did yesterday was take my kid to the playground and read a book while he napped.
And I was nine months pregnant at this time of year two years ago, couldn’t got on my New England vacay and thought when peanut was overdue that I would be the first woman to stay pregnant forever. It will end…eventually. But I feel your pain. You’re in the home stretch.
July 9th, 2008 at 8:00 am
Oh dear. Mark my words and listen carefully: ENJOY BEING BORED WHILE IT LASTS. This newborn business is rough. For real.
July 9th, 2008 at 8:34 am
I still maintain that pregnancy and writing do NOT go hand in hand.
But, hey, as long as you’re writing about something, you’ll keep those 400 readers. Me, on the other hand…well, if I expected 100 comments, each one of my readers would need to comment TWENTY FIVE times. Sigh.
July 9th, 2008 at 8:39 am
Oh dear. I am due with my boy a week after you, my daughter is just a few months younger than your Pooh. And I too have that sense ennui that I cannot put into words. Mine may be the result of trying to write boring medical supply copy… at home I want to be ’stimulated’ at work, and at work I can only think about what I could be doing at home.
July 9th, 2008 at 8:47 am
Oh lovey, you are not boring. It’s your hormones playing tricks on you. I swear, every week before I start the rag, I think I’m the worst blogger to walk the earth and I should dig a hole and live there. And hey, you did break 100! I’ve barely broken 50.
I think comments are down because it’s summertime and people do odd things like get out of the house and away from the computer.
I know it’s Yankees that do these odd things because the heat won’t melt their skin away as it does down here in L.A. (lower alabama) Once the west coast got out of school this month, I noticed a drop in my comments. At least that is what I tell myself. I’m sure in 3 weeks, I’ll think it’s because I’m the worst blogger to walk the earth again.
July 9th, 2008 at 9:21 am
Haha, you stink. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten 100 comments on one post.
You are just that cool and entertaining. Look how many people are still reading about trips to the OB. I’m fascinated and cannot wait until baby 2 comes.
July 9th, 2008 at 9:22 am
Usually I am OK to bring the funny. But today I got nothin’. But 100+ comments? damn.
July 9th, 2008 at 9:29 am
Its comforting to know others are getting less comments too. Was starting to wonder if I’ve become that wierd kid in class who smells funny…
July 9th, 2008 at 9:46 am
I’m sorry that you are bored. I’ll be begging for advice on my brand new blog over the next few days. And it will be in regards to my future MIL so feel free to vent.
July 9th, 2008 at 9:54 am
I have been having a little writers block over at my blog too. Boring= boring!
July 9th, 2008 at 9:58 am
I’ve been commentting for you! Hang in there!
July 9th, 2008 at 10:31 am
Better late than never, huh?
July 9th, 2008 at 11:00 am
[...] Sucks « C’mon, You Know You Want To [...]
July 11th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
[...] they are just that good, and because I am just that lazy, and because the pain in my right ribcage from the foot lodged there is truly so excruciating that this morning I actually cried, and because I wrote my heart out [...]