I’m beginning to believe The Poo dropped on our doorstep fully formed, able to sleep, eat and poop all by her own self.
That’s what it feels like, ya’ll. Like I am a first-time mother for the second time. What’s THAT all about? Huh? Huh?
I can’t remember how to get him on a schedule. I can’t remember how much I should feed him. I can’t remember to change his poor diaper. I’m all, hey kid, this is a seriously wet diaper! Oh, yeah, its been four hours since I changed you!
Don’t go reporting me to social services, m’kay? I’m telling you this because I need advice.
Yes, that’s right. I am asking the interwebz for assvice, on purpose. I know that’s like putting out a dish of vitriol and asking ye olde trolls to come and have some, but I’m desperate.
Here is the 411:
Shaggy Boy is eight weeks and three days old. He seems to be taking two good naps a day, but he won’t sleep in the crib. He only wants to nap in his cradle swing. Which is, totally, my fault. I conditioned him into sleeping there, mostly because it was the only way he would sleep.
Now, my little Pavlov is addicted to it. And I admit I use that to my advantage, because the kid is powerless against that thing. He sleeps for hhhhhooooourrrrs. Hours I need to get shit done.
Very, very occasionally, he will sleep through the night. Like last night, he went to sleep at 9 p.m., woke at midnight for one feeding, and put himself back to sleep when he woke again at 3 a.m. But typically, he is up every three to four hours for a bottle.
Now, The Poo went to sleep the night she turned eight weeks old and slept like - wait for it - a baby for years. She has sleep issues right now, too, but that’s a post for another day.
I am putting Shaggy Boy in the crib, but most nights he falls asleep (*ducks*) in the swing. I know, I know! Terrible idea. Just ask Linda. I can’t help it. I NEED HIM TO SLEEP PEOPLE.
He is eating four ounces every four hours or so, and we are still fiddling with his formula. He is getting doctor-prescribed juice and soy formula, to see if we can curb the constipation. Should he be getting six ounces at longer intervals?
I’m still not convinced that he doesn’t have reflux. He spits up a lot and he also gets gas like nobody’s business, no matter what formula he is on. Any thoughts about/experience with that?
I need assvice of the eating and sleep-training kind, oh ye wise mamas. Because as it turns out, waiting three and three-quarters years to have another kid means that your memory has been wiped clean.
Otherwise, everyone in the world would only do this once - because LET ME TELL YOU, this shit is hard.
Now let me have it!
October 4th, 2008 at 5:00 pm
Okay, no advice for you, but I am anxiously waiting to see what other people chime in with.
My baby is 6 1/2 weeks old. She won’t sleep in her bassinet and she won’t sleep in her crib. She will only sleep in her swing or with me.
I know I need to work harder at putting her down in the crib and the bassinet/play pen thing, but… I like having two or three hours to get stuff done while she sleeps in the swing.
So I’m right there with you. And I’m following along to see what advice comes through.
October 4th, 2008 at 5:15 pm
Einey was sleeping on her own through the night at 7 weeks, Meenie a little longer. But, it took Moe 10 months. I (ducks head) let her sleep in our room in the swing for like the first 3 months. Or I would have her swaddled and co-sleep. Finally, I cut the cord at 10 months and let her CIO in her crib. She cried FOR HOURS the first two months. But it worked!
Just try putting him down when you can - or put him in the swing and moving him.
October 4th, 2008 at 5:16 pm
Err that should have read two days not two months.
October 4th, 2008 at 5:47 pm
Ha Ha–you think you’ve got a problem because your wee two-month-old and his swing addiction, I am here for the sole purpose of making you feel better.
Until a week ago, our five-month-old slept exclusively in his cradle swing, all night, every night. When you’ve got a kid who will give you between 7 and 9 hours consistently in the swing, in comparison to 4 hours max in the crib, the swing is sort of a no-brainer in my book.
But, I too felt the push to wean him off the swingin’ papasan crack, and so last week commenced operation crib transfer at our house.
So far things are getting better. So, here’s my transitional advice.
We put him the boy down in his crib now every night to start with so that he gets learns to fall asleep there. Then when he wakes up (we’re up to about 5-6ish hours before wake up), we transfer him to the swing. We also started doing all naps in the crib (except right now of course, at which time he is peacefully slumbering in the swing).
Tonight I’m going to try and get him back down in his crib in the middle of the night after he wakes up. I’ve mainly not fought that battle out of pure laziness, and a profound love for sleep.
Our 2-year-old also spent the first 6-months of his life as a mostly swing sleeper, and I can assure you that at 2, he is no longer sleeping in the swing.
No worries, you’re doing just fine. Just take sleep, however it comes.
I would also try and up the bottle amount–perhaps to 5 ounces? That may buy you an hour or so more.
October 4th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
Well, Patrick didn’t truly sleep through the night until he was almost 2 (just recently). He would wake almost every hour or two. He wouldn’t nurse or take a bottle well, or, he would only do it when half asleep. We finally determined he did have reflux of the “silent” variety meaning no spit, instead he would swallow it back down. Burn. The thing that helped us get through the first 9 months was the Amby. It’s this hammock (I recently saw a picture of one in Sarah Palin’s office — at least she can get that right) that comes from Australia. He did start sleeping better meaning only waking up about twice a night but for him that was great. Once he was pulling up, etc. we put him in the crib and it wasn’t a bad transition. For the first 4 months, he slept in our room in the Amby. When he would stir, the Amby would rock him back to sleep. When he would stir a lot, one of use would give the Amby a swing and he would go back to sleep. It’s expensive but was a lifesaver for us with the reflux and no sleep. Good luck!
Oh, also if he does have reflux, you don’t want to necessarily increase the amoung of formula because he needs time to digest. More frequent feedings in smaller amounts than a non-reflux baby would take.
October 4th, 2008 at 6:15 pm
We had gassy baby for weeks. Due to what mama unknowingly was eating…
He slept in the swing, or on the couch on one of our chests. I think it took til about 12 weeks for him to really sleep well. I wouldn’t worry about it too much really. Is it bad that he’s sleeping in the swing for some reason? And if he truly does have reflux then they say propping them up to sleep helps.
I second the thought of seeing if he’ll eat more. At four months when our son started waking up more and more often to eat we started feeding him a little baby cereal in the evening. I know Shaggy is too young for that, but perhaps he does just need a bit more in his tummy.
Good luck!
October 4th, 2008 at 6:21 pm
i am by no means an experienced mother but my son is only 16 months old so i remember what it was like those first few months. he slept in the swing for naps for about 6 months (or until he could sit up and scare the s**t outta me when in the swing). he did have baaaad reflux that was diagnosed at 3 weeks b/c he would cry any time we lay him down flat. we had to always keep him on an incline and he could only swing side to side otherwise it would aggravate the reflux. he had silent reflux so not much spitting up. just lots of colic and nonstop crying at the top of his lungs for 5-6 months. not fun. it was mostly diagnosed by our description and then a trial of zantac. the zantac helped a little but we moved to something stronger that seemed to help more. i also read that newborns can only be awake for 2 hours or so at a time and then you should try to put them down for a nap. that seemed to help him sleep better and i created a schedule that way. it’s probably easier if you only have that one child though for scheduling purposes but you can try that. i also wore him a lot in a baby carrier when i was out for his naps too. once i got him on a schedule he started sleeping through the night- which by the way is defined as 6 hours. yikes- that was not a full night to me but it was better than every 2 hours. the swing was my friend too. i didn;t wean him off it until i had to. i just did whatever i needed to to get him to sleep. i hope this makes sense. i am not a good writer!
October 4th, 2008 at 6:25 pm
I was a breast feeder, so I’m not really sure about the size of his bottles. I will tell you that by the time my son was 2 months old, he somewhere over 13 lbs and the peditrician estimated he was eating between 6-7 oz of breastmilk per feeding, based on his weight (nursing 6-8 times a day.) Apparently, they are supposed to eat approximately as many ounces as they are kilograms heavy. Not sure if this is just breastmilk or also formula.
As for the sleeping… Oscar (now almost 16 months) exclusively napped in his swing or on me until he was four months, but was sleeping through the night like your Poo by 9 weeks (10+hours, heaven!!!) in his crib.
But, eventually, I realized he had to also nap in his crib. Here is what I did. I just packed up the swing and stopped using it. I know, dramatic. And then, I just nursed or rocked him to sleep. It took a while for him to be rocked to sleep at first, but after a few weeks, he got used to it.
Nursing/rocking to sleep presents it’s own problems down the road, but it got him in his crib initially.
Good luck!
October 4th, 2008 at 6:26 pm
Oh, and for the diapers - I just changed him everytime I nursed, so every 3 hours or so. I just made it part of the feeding routine.
October 4th, 2008 at 7:14 pm
I lived by the Babywise book… at least for the most part. I have 3 kids ages 6, 5, and 20mo. The oldest slept all night in a crib at 6 weeks, the next one at 8 weeks, and because of the last one’s heart surgery he was 12 weeks when he slept through the night. Typically they were about 10 lbs. when that happened. I am not sure how much they were eating b/c i was a breastfeeder. Follow your gut, let him cry a little… he will be okay. Also, my 5 year old had reflux and we slightly inclined his bed and that really helped.
October 4th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
hmmm…me thinks he needs a good thumpin from Auntie Amy. AND let me just say this about that…if he is still doing this when he is 12 - then I might tap you on the shoulder and say WTF?? For now - considering how bad he sounds when he DOES sleep - get out the batteries and let the child sleep where he wishes. I HEARD this child I have FELT this child try to breath in his sleep…do NOT beat yourself up. Do they make swings that work via generator and not battery??
Be kind to you.
October 4th, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Each kid is new; nothing seems to work the same.
I say if that swing works, then use it.
Zack loved his for months & months and it saved my sanity.
(They will give it up. It will be ok.)
October 4th, 2008 at 7:44 pm
My advice:
1. Quit trying so hard. I know that sounds stupid, but really, cut yourself some slack.
2. Who cares where he sleeps, I’ve known people who had kids that would only sleep in their car seat on top of the dryer…with it running.
3 Reflux or no, he simply may sleep better inclined for a reason…it feels better to his digestive system.
4. This is the most expensive thing I can think of and that is Alimentum. Jace didn’t have reflux, although he could spit a country mile when he spit up (and he spit up often) and he didn’t have a soy issue, but the only formula that didn’t cause him to be a wild man after eating was Alimentum. At that time, the stuff was like 10 a jug for the ready made (and neither of my kids tolerated powdered formula because of the fizz) and by the time he was 10 months old, he was nearing a jug of that stuff a day. I started sneaking cows milk by then because the money was killing us.
5. And, I definitely would see if he would take more at a feeding. My oldest son was drinking 6 to 7 oz by 6 weeks, the youngest didn’t eat so big but..you never know…
But, that’s my only thoughts…oh and “this too shall pass”
October 4th, 2008 at 7:58 pm
As a mom to four I too let the wee ones catch the majority of their sleeping in the swing. And the first one was in the ole wind up ones, that was hard, thank god for battery powered ones. None of them napped well til after 6months of age. The three boys all were very gassy and constipated, thinking its a boy thing in my house. The two youngest got their fair share of plums and prunes to at least move things along. In time they all outgrew this issue as well. Hang in there, it does get easier.
October 4th, 2008 at 8:09 pm
Wow. I feel old. *smile* My boys are teenagers, but your comment about gas brought up an old memory …
My oldest son had a TERRIBLE time with gas, as in, he was in pain it was so bad sometimes.
I bottle fed both my boys and I learned, through trial and error, that old fashioned bottles did not work well with my boys. Instead, I bought the Playtex bottles with the plastic liners (do they even still make those??) and sure enough, those bottles solved the gassy problems. They swallowed less air, therefore wasn’t as gassy. It also helped with the spitting up, as well. (My oldest would projectile vomit - that was fun).
As far as the swing … for now? I think I’d leave him alone in the swing. As you mentioned, you’re getting sleep and time. Once you feel like you have a better handle on things, then you might start thinking about “weaning” him off the swing and putting him in his crib for naps, then ease him into night time. I’m with the other commenters, if it’s working for you right now, I’d not rock the cradle, or stop the swing, in this case. *grin*
I hope this helps? Definitely look at the bottles you’re using though - you’d be surprised how much that can change things!
October 4th, 2008 at 8:37 pm
I am like you, I don’t have much of a memory of those days. But I remember a few things that worked — the #1 thing was the miracle blanket. That thing truly worked miracles for us. We used the Weissbluth book for other advice. I too had a swing sleeper, but only for naps.
October 4th, 2008 at 8:43 pm
I, of course, am not one to give any sort of advice, but….
The book “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child” really did help us to get all of our kids onto a good sleep schedule.
October 4th, 2008 at 9:19 pm
OK - my youngest is 16 months and my oldest is 4 years. Let’s see what I remember. I remember it sucked for the first 3 months. I still remember that and that is why I’m not pregnant yet.
I also love the book Healthy Sleepy Habits, Happy Child. For my first son we waited until 4 months to “fix” his issues (being help all the time). For my second we waited until 3 months (which is when the author of that book says it’s OK to let them CIO). so, both boys cried it out for awhile - and it sucked - but now it’s all good.
My second had reflux - we did 3 things for him - I changed my diet drastically, when we used formula we used Alimentum, and he had a few visits to a chiropractor for some minor adjustments. We also found out he has a milk sensitivity - so the diet change and formula were good. The chiropractor? I dunno - he got better. My friend took her daughter (with reflux) for two adjustments and she hasn’t spit up at all since then (she was I think 9 weeks old when they took her).
Neither one of mine ever liked the swing. For the oldest it was my arms. For my younger one it was the sling. Good luck, don’t worry - and I guess my advice is to maybe try a chiropractor - if you know one that’s not a quack - and wait until 3 or 4 months to try to fix anything. Oh - and now that I’m thinking, our doctor suggested raising one side of the crib to help with the reflux thing - we never did it.
October 4th, 2008 at 9:45 pm
OOh, I remember that feeling well, and there are exactly 2 yrs between mine!!
I can’t help you with sleep at all. My oldest started sleeping through the night at about 2 (that would be years, not months), and my younger son still wakes throughout the night; many nights he ends up in our bed with us. We tried sleep training with both; the younger would cry so hard he would throw up, so we gave up. We generally have always let them both sleep where they fall and move to beds later (tho, now they actually go to bed and we read books, so see? didn’t last forever!!) They both gave up naps between 1-2!!
Both my boys were primarily formula fed - oldest had bad reflux / sensitivities and the Enfamil Nutramigen is what saved our lives,PLUS the use of the Dr. Brown’s bottles.
I am a huge believer in “whatever works for you” parenting. If the swing is helping, use it! He won’t stay in there forever.
You’re doing just fine, btw!
October 4th, 2008 at 10:08 pm
I have a 7 and a half week old, and he has gas really bad, our dr. suggested we use mylecon (it can be found at walgreens in the baby isle) a drop in his bottle or in his mouth seems to reduce the amount of gas he gets during a feeding. We rarely get a burp out of him, but when we use the mylecon it seems to help tremendously. We also bought Playtex Ventair bottles (at Target) and they do well with releasing the air in the bottle. I also found that instead of shaking the bottle when making your formula, we put in the water, then the formula, then stir it with a fork instead of shaking. Less air bubbles.
Schedules do help, our son lets us know when he’s wet. I can’t go 3-4 hours with him soaking in his diaper unless he’s sound asleep. I just think damn .25 cents every diaper! I think I go through 20 a day (we don’t but it feels that way) I have him on a schedule before a feeding - change diaper, then if he’s crying I know there is something wrong and its process of elimination. Diaper, Rock, Pacifier, Hunger (only if its time), Gas, its usually one of those, and if not I go through them again usually after the second round we’ve calmed him down.
We have our son sleep in the crib but at an incline in the boppy. I know sleeping is not suggested in the boppy but he naps in it and it works for us. We’ve been slowly trying to get him off of it, but we’re just surpased the 10lbs stage and he sleeps almost 6 hours at night in between feedings of 4oz. So I’m at the point where if it works then he’s in it. Only when he’s really really tired can I get him to lay flat without waking up or just really pissed off.
Follow your gut, moms instinct, if the swing works for Shaggy, so be it. Your not a bad mom, and don’t ever thing that. Both the Poo and Shaggy are lucky to have you. Mommy needs her rest and if thats what works, then swing on swinger.
October 4th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
send him off to auntie flutter?
October 4th, 2008 at 11:58 pm
I too parked the swing in our room with both of the girls. It was the ONLY way Giggles would sleep and she was a light sleeper at that. So there was no transitioning her to the crib. The Chicken was a bit easier to get to the crib as she like the blankets wrapped around her. Giggles slept in her swing until she was nearly 7 mos old and too big for her swin (plus she would reach out and grab the legs and stop it suddenly and laugh like a crazy woman and it would give me a heart attack) She had to CIO in her crib because she wouldn’t sleep in bed with us.
As for the formula feeding, I can’t help you. Both of the girls breast fed.
October 5th, 2008 at 12:06 am
I’ve tagged you.
You’re it.
October 5th, 2008 at 6:17 am
My first baby was just like this. Just.
She wouldn’t sleep, she vomited every other feed. I know exactly how you feel. I spent weeks and weeks cradling her, co-sleeping, not sleeping, trying in vain to get her to sleep in her moses basket. She would fall deeply asleep in my arms and I could sneeze and she wouldn’t move - put her down in the basket and she’d be awake within a minute. She slept 1.5hrs at a time and fed every 2. 2oz feeds until she was 8 weeks. Consequently my life was the mirror of that. I felt at the end of my tether because I was just. so. tired.
But now after having my second & being a little stricter - I was adamant from the beginning that I wouldn’t go through the same thing and after about 2 weeks I was gently strict about introducing her to the basket. Every night for the last feed (I bottle fed too) I took her upstairs to my dark bedroom, fed her and lay her down in the basket whilst I watched a subtitled movie in the dark. I shaded her crib from the flicker of the screen while she settled and after the first couple of nights I didn’t even have to pick her up to resettle.
Now far from bragging - here’s the thing: I just think they’re all different. As different as we are.
I could blame myself for being too soft on my first baby but actually I *know* that what worked with my second would never have worked with my first. She was a needy, cuddly sleeper and the only thing that got her to sleep (other than me) was the vibrating chair! And trust me - when I found that vibrating chair at about 5weeks in - she went in it A LOT!
I remember my mum saying (as I was complaining one day about the first baby) ‘don’t worry - they all end up eating roast dinners eventually’.
I think if you are getting some relief from him and he is getting his much needed sleep (because let’s face it - babies don’t sleep for hours unless they want to) in the swinging chair then really, who is this hurting? He won’t be in a swinging chair when he’s 15. It will work itself out I’m sure.
As for the feeding things - here’s my assvice for this one… Try making a 5oz feed (or a slightly larger one) and see how much he takes and if he drinks that easily then try making the same the next time. I remember getting so frustrated sometimes at their lack of consistency and the wastage of formula when they would usually drink 6 but then only take 4 just when I got used to making larger bottles. I would get spectacularly irritated that I couldn’t predict what they wanted.
I know it’s hard because you feel there must be a magic formula that you’re missing somewhere but he won’t drink more than he wants and he’ll stop when he’s full. That’s the beauty of babies
(I wish I could do the same!)
I hope I haven’t blah’d on too long. I’m not sure I’ve actually said anything useful! Best wishes and thinking of you - Gawd knows - this ain’t my *favourite* time of the mamahood.
xx
October 5th, 2008 at 6:44 am
What’s the weight limit on the swing? I’ve seen hammocks that go pretty high; so if it’s not looming safety issue, I say keep using it and get your work/sleep.
Also, most babies aren’t ready to STTN until 11 or so weeks (probably age adjust that for Shaggy since he arrived early). If you want to transition from the swing sooner than later, maybe wait until he’s about a month older so he’ll more likely be physically able to sleep for longer periods then? And aren’t you getting ready to travel soon? If so, I really recommend waiting until you come home from travel to tackle transitioning. Then again, maybe I should just add a disclaimer - my 23 month old has slept uninterrupted for 6 hours exactly once and she’s never STTN - and be quiet.
October 5th, 2008 at 8:15 am
I think it’s important to remember that you don’t have to do anything a certain way. If he sleeps best in his swing and you need those hours to spend with your daughter or to get things done, that’s fine. If he wants to eat every 4 hours, and it keeps him happy, that’s fine too. Just because books or well meaning people tell you he should sleep in a crib and should sleep all night, that doesn’t mean he has to. You have to do what works for you, for him and for your family and your sanity. I have two kids and they are very different in their routines. My daughter was a challenging sleeper who preferred my arms (the sling was my best friend for the first 4 months). My son hated the sling but slept in his bouncy chair for the first 4 months. They both ate every 3 hours for endless amounts of months and my son still eats at night and he’s 15 months old (but underweight). You just do what keeps you sane and realize that in the big picture, it will do no harm. Will it matter that he slept in his swing a few years from now? No. Will it matter that he ate every 3 hours? No. Will you feel better that he was content and that you stayed sane? Yes.
As for reflux -my son has bad reflux, he vomited a lot and failed to gain weight. And when I say a lot, I mean bucket fulls after eating, like you could hear a splash in the next room. He also coughed when lying down and did a double swallow/gag thing. If you are concerned, mention it to your doctor. A 2 week trial of reflux meds won’t do any harm and may help. He might like the swing for sleeping as it elevates his head which helps with reflux. My son has his crib mattress elevated (a few towels underneath the mattress). Makes a huge difference (also why he liked his bouncy chair).
Wendy
October 5th, 2008 at 9:03 am
A friend of mine also battled with her baby (who’s now 2), to get her to sleep at night. Eventually they went to a sleep therapist, who got the kid on a routine (fixed nap times, for fixed hours), and it worked like a charm. She was easily sleeping through the night, no matter where they put her.
Maybe you could try something like that?
And don’t worry about bad habits with sleeping… my nephew is 2 years and 4 months old, and he still sleeps in his parents’ bed.
October 5th, 2008 at 9:20 am
I am not much help on the sleep thing. My kids didn’t sleep through the night until they were months old. Oh yeah, fun times, let me tell you. My son had to scream for hours at 12 mos old before he got the picture that I had had enough and needed him to just sleep. Go ahead call CPS on me, the boy sleeps like no one’s business, now. He is one stubborn little so and so.
Have you ever tried those gas drops, the name escapes at the moment. Daughter had horrible gas and the drops before every meal helped a lot. I still remember those screams 6 years later. The call after a 3 hour scream fest (yeah, I shouldn’t have had that Taco Bell. Stupid rookie move.)crying to the ped nurse got me the key to the golden gate of peace. Son use to spit up a lot, or what seemed a lot. The doctor told me it wasn’t bad, but the drops helped him, too. He wasn’t as good with the passing of gas as his sister. While breastfeeding I gave them a shot before each session and then when they went to bottles I would put the drops right in the bottle.
As for the swing. My kids slept in the swing for ages. And yes, daughter slept in it at night. It is no fun when you are tired and whatever works, works. Both my kids eventually went to their cribs before they turned a year old and have stayed there. I need my sleep and I declare war.
Good Luck
October 5th, 2008 at 9:27 am
I feel for you. My boy us just over 7 weeks. He’s pretty good, knock on wood, but I too seem to have forgotten everything between the 3 year old girl and this new little guy.
He still doesn’t sleep through the night. He still gets up every 3-4 hours to eat no matter the time of day. He is indifferent to the swing, but definitely prefers the cradle of my arm in bed over his bassinet, which is an equally bad habit.
I don’t have much advice, except to say that what I do remember is that they keep changing. What is the most awful thing now - ie swing sleeping - is entirely different in another month or two. I believe in feeding and sleeping on demand and letting a schedule form itself, even with a more than occassional desperate swing sleep. Give him a little more forumla, we are at 5 oz. every 3 hours, sometimes he doesn’t finish, sometimes he just wants to be topped off with a few ounces and then wants more in another hour.
Good luck… I am right behind you by days and sleepless nights.
October 5th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
I read your blog often but rarely comment; I had to this time.
My daughter (now
slept in her swing at night and nap time until she was 10 months old. (ducking head in embarrassment) Yes, she was almost touching the floor and the thing barely moved but she, too, had silent reflux and was unable to lay down comfortably. Alimentum formula helped her A LOT, though.
I have a pillow propping up the top of my nearly two year old’s crib mattress because I think he has a touch of reflux, too.
My schedules with my children sort of just happened and I don’t know if they can be forced or not.
Good luck!
October 5th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
That was supposed to say (now eight) not a smiley!
October 5th, 2008 at 12:40 pm
Sorry to be a comment hog but you may try Mylicon or Gripe Water, too, to help calm his poor little tummy…
October 5th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Babe. You know that note in your purse? You have permission to let him sleep in the swing. It ain’t broke. Don’t fix it.
October 5th, 2008 at 1:32 pm
Its been a while since I dealt with this (my youngest will be 3 next week), but I do remember it was tough to transfer out of the car seat and into the crib. They did sleep in the swing a bit, but they were addicted to sleeping in the car seat, both of them.
My oldest slept in the car seat until he was 2 months old. I always put the car seat in his crib and put him in the seat, so that he was at least used to the crib somewhat. It seemed to be the laying flat that really bothered him. I knew he was ready to sleep flat when he started scooting down out of the seat in his sleep (good thing the seat was in his crib!). Then I laid him flat and never looked back.
Daughter was a little tougher. She still is a horrible sleeper and was tougher to break of the car seat. I remember, though, that I did it at nap time. I knew I wouldn’t be up to fighting with her or staying up listening to her cry at night, so I began with her daytime naps. I laid her flat in her bed for naps. Once she was fine with it by day, laying her down for bedtime was no big deal.
I hope this helps.
October 5th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
Ummm……….I did the same thing with my oldest. I had to be at work at 6 am. When she woke up and wouldn’t go back to sleep, I put her in her swing. I woke up many times to a baby who had kicked her covers off and was cold. I felt soooooo bad, but I did get a little sleep.
October 5th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
I only wish I had a swing for my TallBoy when he was a baby. The absolute ONLY way he would sleep was on my chest, tucked right under my chin. (For 6 months!!!) I finally got a sling, but for a long time, I held him like that and did chores one handed. Let me tell you, I almost never got a shower. It was pretty miserable… But he is 15 now and sleeps like the dead.
In his OWN bed.
Just do what works and he’ll work himself out.
October 5th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
Two of my kids had some reflux issues. We didn’t have a swing but we put them to sleep in their infant carseats for the first 4-5 months. Sleeping inclined like that worked miracles. Who cares if it’s not what Dr. Spock would advise. No kid ever went to college still sleeping in a swing or carseat. And about the whole schedule thing? It took our kids three months or so to find a good rhythm. And then, sadly, when we just got our groove going, something would change like an illness, or losing a nap, or getting teeth. So, unfortunately, schedules are often illusive until they are several months old. This is hard on us Mommies who like a good routine, but eventually I really think you’ll find one. Try and give yourself a break, use your swing and any other mommy weapon short of whisky in a bottle.
October 5th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
Heh, the good napping sounds like Henry a bit. He slept through the night from 10 weeks to 4 months, then he didn’t sleep through the night again until he was 18 months. I’d stick with the swing if it’s working for ya. At least it’s not the crank swings our parents had.
October 5th, 2008 at 7:49 pm
http://www.pollywogbaby.com/
You might find some helpful reflux items here.
October 5th, 2008 at 8:53 pm
My second son (born exactly 13 months after the first one) was a fabulous sleeper. It was the third one who declared a moratorium on sleeping. I remember little from that time, due to REM deprivation. I’ll light a candle for you, sister.
October 5th, 2008 at 10:20 pm
You’ve got tons of advice already. But I agree - I say let Shaggy sleep where he will…the elevation probably helps with reflux…eventually, at 4 months or so maybe [fingers crossed] you can give him cereal and he might sleep longer?
Wow, it’s hard to remember those times! (And we’re thinking about another one, too!)
October 5th, 2008 at 10:22 pm
It took Rowan until she was 8 MONTHS old to sleep through the night. And naps? Those didn’t even really start until she was about 5 months old. Before that, she was just all crabby, all the time. (Colic.) And I breastfed and she refused a bottle, so it was also all Mommy, all the time.
So me? I’m thinking quitcher whining, lady. So he sleeps in a swing. Big whoop. There are going to be bigger fish to fry.
My cousin’s kid slept in his car seat, set in the crib, until he outgrew it.
OK, I’m tired. I’ll stop yelling at you now. Go get some sleep, Mom! And stop worrying so much. He won’t still sleep in it by college, promise.
October 6th, 2008 at 7:54 am
I say if he actually sleeps in the swing and gives you a little peace and relaxation, then let him sleep in the swim. No such thing as a spoiled infant, right.
October 6th, 2008 at 10:47 am
My first boy was sort of like this, though we stayed away from the crib at night. I’ve actually managed to train my second boy to hate the swing (go me!).
I think you’re just going to have to suck it up and let him cry for a little. We had to train my first to not only go without the swing, but to also fall asleep without being swaddled. We did what our ped. recommended. Put him down where you want him to sleep (instead of being swaddled, we used a sleep sack to keep him warm), leave the room and go back in increasing increments until he falls asleep on his own.
As far as how much you’re giving him, let him eat as much as he’ll take at a feeding. I can’t seem to get my now 4 month old to take more than 5 ounces at a time, so he’s waking up a few times at night but I put him straight back in the crib when he’s done. He normally goes back to sleep on his own.
As far as the gas, put a dose of mylecon in each bottle. After a while he’ll get used to processing the gas on his own and won’t need it as much.
October 6th, 2008 at 10:49 am
Almost forgot, my 4 month old has neck problems that are a result of his position in the womb, but the chiropractor says that it more often happens from being in swings and carseats too much. So, if you want to try and avoid that too it would be best if you nix the swing now.
Also, I meant to tell you that the younger the kid is, the easier it will be to transition him to a different place to sleep.
Good Luck!
October 6th, 2008 at 11:21 am
I have a friend who had two kids with reflux. They were both put on medicine and her 3 year old outgrew it at some point. Her 7 month old still has it but the medicine works wonders!
I’m sure everyone has told you that no two kids are alike, especially your own. My 8 month old is not like my 3 year old at all.
If you are concerned that you aren’t feeding Shaggy enough, put 6ozs of formula in a bottle and he’ll stop when he’s full.
Babies get gas, their digestive system just isn’t developed enough. Some people say put that gas medicine in their formula. Our pediatrician isn’t a fan of the stuff. Go with what works for you.
Both of my kids loved their swings, but at different ages. My 3 year old loved it from ages 3 - 6 months and had his afternoon nap in it. My 8 month old *had* to have her evening nap in it until she was about 2 or 3 months old. It sits in our living room taking up space.
But most of all there is no magic cure. If Shaggy wants a schedule, he’ll make it himself. If he doesn’t, you have to adapt. Hang in there, you have about 18 more years to go
October 6th, 2008 at 11:29 am
I haven’t read through all te responses, so apologies if this is duplicate info. Here’s what worked for us:
We put Sugarplum in her bed. When she started to cry, we set the timer.. 2 minutes at first.. 5 minutes.. 7 minutes.. we worked up the time. When the time was up, we’d go in and soothe her in the crib. If that wasn’t working we’d pick her up and calm her, but DO NOT leave the room. She’d go back down in the crib. We’d sneak out. When she cried again, we re-set the timer. It’s a few nights of pure sleepless hell, but it worked.
October 6th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
I am no help on the sleeping front. I have no idea how mine sleeps when he does and doesn’t when he doesn’t. If Shaggy falls asleep in the swing at this point, I’d leave him, but that’s just me. Don’t fix it until it doesn’t work is my new moto. I feed Alex when he wants to eat. If he’s been asleep for a while, well he gets to sleep. I’m just not willing to wake a kid to eat. That sound counter-productive to me.
This is hard. I am so with you on that. And dude, it takes me like 15 minutes to change his dam diaper, which I’m thinking is probably three times longer than it should.
Good luck though.
October 6th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
I have enough of my own sleeping issues weith my 6 month old. For constipation I would try nux vomica, it is a homeopathic remedy and it worked WONDERS for my baby’s constipation and mine!
October 6th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
I don’t understand why he can’t just sleep in the swing.
What’s up, control issues much? (don’t worry - we grownups all have ‘em!) Your womb was shaped nothing like a crib. He feels better in the swing.
You need sleep, he needs sleep, so just go with it.
His preferences will change and then so will your parenting - one thing I know for certain is:
All children are different.
No matter how ‘pain in the ass’ I find that statement to be, once that ‘next kid’ came shooting out my previously paved vagina, I have accepted it as my cross to bear.
October 6th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
I forget everything between babies too! Weird.
I can’t get mine to sleep in the crib before about 4 months. I got nothin’.
October 6th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
Okay, I didn’t have time to read everybody else’s response, but here’s what worked for me. I fed my girl Isomil soy formula because I and everybody else I’m related to is allergic to dairy, and it made her constipated too. So one day my Mom says: just get a child’s suppository, just barely stick the end in her bum, and in 5 minutes she will poop. And boy, did it work! I did it every morning, and sometimes at night too if she seemed uncomfortable. And like, the next day, she started sleeping through the night. And after a couple of weeks, she just started pooping by herself and I didn’t need to do it anymore. Hope that helps!
October 6th, 2008 at 9:10 pm
Super Baby Food (Paperback)
by Ruth Yaron (Author)
It sounds to me that he may be very uncomfortable, gas, like you said… Soy is not a very sound option and you may want to rethink the doctor’s advice.
Relax take a deep breath and know you can only do the best you can, none of us have the answer to fix it for you so you know it is not easy. Even after four I still wonder.
However, I swear that if you get his gut settled you will see a big difference, and as long as he can’t get hurt while in the swing, use it to your advantage.
Think about it this way, you could be one of the mothers who has to carry the little bundle all the time to get a moment of peace. At least your arms are free this way. I am routing for you, you can do it and soon you will be the one giving the advice!
I have two special needs kids and one has severe stomach troubles, I have done tons of research on digestion so please contact me with ANY questions, if I don’t have the answer I will research it.
Also, I am a proponent of the “rapid return” method for getting babies to sleep. Sugarplumsmom set out a strategy, however if he is “unwell” it will just stress everyone out because it wont work until he feels better.
Take care my old friend,
S
October 6th, 2008 at 9:30 pm
Infant Formula Recipe
In addition to high levels of aluminum in soy estrogens in soy (a soy-fed baby receives the equivalent of five birth control pills’ worth of estrogen every day), recent research suggests that high concentrations of manganese in soy can lead to brain damage in infants.
2 Cups - Goats Milk
2 Cups - Enriched Vanilla Rice Dream
1 T. - Black Strap Molasses
1 T. - Liquid Acidophilus
1 T. - Flax Seed Oil
1 t. - Liquid Vitamin C
1 t. - Liquid CalMag (calcium & magnesium)
1/8 t. - Wheat Germ (powdered **)
16 drops - Trace Minerals (concentrated)
1 t. - Infant Vitamins (optional)
I wanted to add this before; I have not checked the validity of the claim against Soy however I am reading over and over again in different sources of how it may not be the great food it was originally touted as.
Take advice with a grain of salt and go with your gut, you are strong.
October 6th, 2008 at 11:44 pm
I swore by Rachel Waddilove’s The Baby Book: How to Enjoy Year One. I used her flexible schedule and my son slept 6 hours at 6 weeks and 12 hours at 12 weeks. She’s genius. I never felt like I was forcing him into the schedule. In fact, a couple times I noticed he didn’t seem hungry when it was time to eat, checked the book and sure enough it was time to add some time between feedings. You can get the book at Amazon.
October 7th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
Am at the coffee shop working — I mean, “working,” — and pretending I am you! I’M FAMOUS PEOPLE! I AM MRS. CHICKEN!!
Anyway, 1) after your first baby you can’t be expected to remember to change diapers until they are overflowing. Consider it your little gift to Mother Earth.
My boys slept in their swings until they were about 8 months old. My oldest slept in her car seat until she was 9 months old. They all had reflux. If you feel like Shaggy has reflux he probably does. Let him keep sleeping in the swing or otherwise upright. Deal with it later. My kids’ transitions from swing/seat to crib were very easy — one night of protesting and that was it.
My youngest was exclusively breastfed at first and her gas was TERRIBLE. Also she wasn’t constipated, but she only pooped every 5-7 days and seemed very uncomfortable the last half of that, even though her poos were smushy like they should be. They had me start supplementing with soy and that didn’t change anything, although later I did discover she had a soy allergy, which sucked.
My gassy baby was only comfortable sleeping on her belly, preferably across my lap so there was a bit of pressure on her tummy. Otherwise she would scream like a banshee and it was a bit unsettling, which is saying a lot coming from a mother who had one baby with severe reflux and twins with moderate reflux.
October 7th, 2008 at 3:33 pm
Poor Mrs. Chicken! Remember that it is okay to let your baby sleep in a swing, on your bed, on your belly, upside down, in a hammock, in a sling, or anywhere else he likes. Later on, when you feel that he is older and more ready, you can go right ahead and let him cry it out. But if you feel he is too little/ at risk of choking/ your beautiful son who you really don’t want to leave to cry… Don’t bother right now. Why torture yourself? And him? You will not spoil him, all that will happen is that you will be letting him sleep wherever he wants. That’s okay. Really! Truly! My boys all slept with me for the first year to year-and-a-half, because I WAS NOT about to get out of my cozy bed for (I thought) no reason. Once I was ready to move them to their own beds, I did. here’s how I did it, and it was fine. The moral of the story is, as you can see by all of the other great advice above, there is no “Right” way. If anyone tries to tell you that you are doing the wrong thing, glare at them and stick out your tongue!
October 8th, 2008 at 9:02 am
My boys each had trouble with formula and the only one that worked for them was Nutramegen. It claims it’s for colic but it also helped with the massive spit up that Sam had. I’m talking enough to soak him, me and the floor all the way across the room. I hope you don’t mind but I included a link to the website so you know what it is that I’m talking about.
I will also let you know it’s expensive but WIC covers it with a doctor’s note if you use the program. I did just to help cover the cost. But I’m also in NY where everything is costly.
As for his sleeping…when I switched my kids to this they were able to sleep a ton better and started not to care where they were as long as they were able to sleep!
Also before I switched my babies also slept in the swing because I needed sleep just as much as they did! Don’t beat yourself up over that!
October 8th, 2008 at 9:03 am
ps sorry I forgot the link to the formula:
http://www.enfamil.com/app/iwp/enfamil/productDetail.do?dm=enf&id=/Consumer_Home2/Enf_Products/ForInfants/NutramigenLIPIL2&iwpst=B2C&ls=0&csred=1&r=3400927011
October 9th, 2008 at 1:50 am
Okay. You don’t know me, but I feel the need to chime in…8 weeks is nada, let me tell you, when it comes to swing sleeping. My babe is 7.5 months and we are still working on the swing ween. She is now at the stage where she starts out in the crib, and we attempt to put her back in the crib after she wakes in the middle of the night- with a success rate of about 50%. Nap time, however, is another story. My sister sure got her money’s worth on that swing, let me tell you.
And as for forgetting everything after waiting 3.75 year to have another kid…don’t feel too bad. My kids are only 22 months apart, and I seriously think I have early onset alzheimers as it relates directly to child-rearing. I can’t remember ANYTHING. Good luck!
October 10th, 2008 at 12:29 pm
My little one had reflux also. But he never spit up he just cried and could not sleep. He also had a constant runny nose from the reflux.
He might be sleeping better in the swing because of the angle he is in. Maybe try putting bricks under the feet of the head end of the crib so the baby’s head is higher. We had to do this for my little one and it really helped with the reflux.
I also tried every bottle made and found that the Dr. Brown bottle helped keep gas away. Hope that helps.
Little B. is 2 1/2 now and we probably will not have another for at least a year and a half, so I am sure I will be in the same position you are in about forgeting how to take care of an infant!
October 10th, 2008 at 9:06 pm
On the feeding thing: Zantac saved us. Could we be certain she had reflux? No. But the symptoms were indicating that, and so the ped had us try it, and it really made a difference. She had gas too, so a switch to the Good Start formula seemed to work for her (it’s hard to remember, but 6 oz sounds familiar). That, and LOTS of burping after each feeding plus gas drops as needed. And bicycling her little legs through a bad bout.
As for sleep issues, I’m not the one to ask. I held her for every nap and she slept in the swing for the first few hours every night so we could eat and get some things done before I took her into bed. The crib never worked for her, no matter what I did. She craved motion, and otherwise had to be ON me. I think you do what you have to do. You can train him at any time, so if the swing works, why not go with it?
It’s important to remember that training is never once-and-for-all anyway, as you always have to retrain (I’m doing it now, in fact, yet again). If you find something that works, stick with it until it doesn’t work anymore and then reinvent.
And yes, I agree with Meredith above, the swing may feel better if he has reflux, b/c of the angle.